Oh what a Monday...

Manic Monday, the song sung out doesn't even come close to the incredibly and utterly horrible start to the day I had.
Well, the day began at an unholy hour when the alarm chimed its enthusiastic self at 0415 hours, yes, you got that right, at 4bloody’o clock in the morning; a groaning self woke up wondering WTF is wrong with the world to make you get up so early. Little did I suspect that this in fact is the high point of the day!
So trying to ignore the buzz through my head, I get ready, not wanting to keep the cab driver waiting. HAH! The alleged waiting would happen only if he would have arrived in the first place!! Apparently the competency required to book even a simple cab is amiss amongst the chosen few for the job! At 5, feeling a bit jittery I called up the cab agency only to find out that the cab is scheduled to arrive on time, except that the time is 4.45 in the evening, not morning! Yes, this is what I call as a wtfmonday! After frantic calls to numerous cab companies, being greeted in an incomprehensible morning mumble, my desperate pleas were heard by a saviour. So a cab booked, although a bit late made me feel a bit comfortable, slightly elated about the small personal victory I had just achieved.
After an uneventful ride to the airport, I arrived upon a sea of people; it felt like a mass exodus, like the time of partition, with people racing against all odds to reach across to safety. Standing in the check in line, with hurried glances to my watch every few seconds made me reach the counter, greeted by a hassled and embarrassed ground staff. “Sorry sir, the flight is full, you are late!” Say whaaat? Lady, its 50 mins to the flight take off, are you for real? Typical nuisance of capitalism, over booking and making a profit! So there I was stunned, zapped and such being told to wait. Thus ensued a conversation ranging from threatening notes to pleading for help. After a battle of wits, thankfully I was transferred to another flight which was due to take off 10 mins later. “Score!” Is what went through the back of my mind.
Rushing to the security check, I was greeted by what can be referred to as a “Langar!”; a free meal that is given in Hindu temples and Gurudwaras, where one and all queue up for a free meal. It actually seemed like the airlines had distributed free air tickets and everyone decided this was the time they wanted to travel. After standing in the queue of about 1973 people, the CRPF (a note to the unwary, they are the security personnel guarding all airports in India) personnel decided that their shift had ended, without caring about the relieving officer to come and replace them. “Yes, my workers union rocks, I can simply leave when my work is done, who the hell are you to judge me!” The grumbles quite soon reached a crescendo and pretty soon the harassed and grumpy guards had to come again. “Yes, there is a God!”
Clearing the security check, I donned the avatar of Usain Bolt, quite literally bolting to board my flight. Fortunately I had fellow passengers, suffering the same woes as myself. Boarding the flight, which a slight sheen of sweat, which was more to do with the mind than the physical exertion I started searching for my seat. Finally, some respite and an easy breathe.” No, my son, not so soon”, was what fate was telling me. At the farthest corner of the plane, I got middle seats, the chair was the one which did not recline and to boot it up, I was seated between two blobs of mass whose flesh was spilling from all sides. This was to be one hell of a journey.
On the bright side, having such a harrowing start to the day, the regular fuck ups that happen every day seem not even glance worthy. So far so good (or bad!), I am now just waiting to end the day with a glass of rum and some nice retro music. (Please hear me God!)